List of Expensive Verbal Insults for Drivers in Germany

So you think your German is not good enough to insult others, well, your hand gesture (the middle finger, e.g.) might be enough for you to be fined by the authorities.

Against common belief, there is no difference in whether you insult a police offer or any other person on the street, the charges remain the same. The charge only differs based on the offender’s income and social standing.

For example, a few years back, a famous German soccer player was fined € 10.000 for calling someone an ‘Arschloch’. An average worker would have gotten away with a much lower fine.

This is a shortlist of the most common insults, which come with a €1.000 fine:

  • “Arschloch”, “Drecksau”
  • “Wichser”, “Scheißwichser”
  • “Blöde Schlampe”, “alte Schlampe”
  • “Schlampen, ihr elendigen!”
  • “Sie haben den totalen Knall”
  • Sie sind “blöd im Kopf”
  • “Verbrecherin”, “blöde Kuh”
  • “Arschloch” plus showing the middle finger

Insults are not a trivial offense, but a criminal one, based on German law. This can lead to hefty fines or imprisonment.

On the other hand, the statements/name calling listed below remain free of charge:

  • “Sie können mich mal …”
  • “Oberförster”, “Wegelagerer” oder “Komischer Vogel” to a  police officer
  • “Leck mich am Arsch!” (if used around the Stuttgart area)
  • “Das ist doch Korinthenkackerei” (when arguing about a parking ticket)
  • “Parkplatzschwein” to a person parking in a non-parking zone.

Source: German ADAC – March 2019

Avoid road rage (lovely long German term: im Straßenverkehr ausbrechender Jähzorn), and keep cool.

Bicycles on Trains and Buses around Frankfurt

Yesterday’s question from an expat was about taking bicycles on board of trains in buses in and around the Frankfurt area.

Here is a short explanation of what you can and cannot do.

 

RMV Fahrrad mitnehmen

* You can bring your bicycle free of charge on trains and buses of the RMV.

* There are no restrictions for bikes on the S-Bahn and regional trains.

* The following restrictions only apply to U-Bahn, trams and buses:

Bringing your bike onto the U-Bahn, tram, or bus is NOT allowed Monday – Friday between 6:00 – 8:30 and 16:00 – 18:30 (morning and evening rush hour)

All other times (except the listed rush hour times from Mon – Fri) and all other days (weekends and Hessian school breaks), you can bring your bike along.

* You can’t bring your bike onto a minibus.

* Please remember that wheel chairs and strollers/baby carriages always have priority.

The mention of the evening rush hour times prompted another topic – why Germans go to bed so early. There will be more about that in my next post.

 

When Good English is Important

Just listening to this You Tube clip Air China talks to JFK Ground left me sweating a bit, for both the Air China pilot and the JFK Air Traffic Controller.

I have flown twice with China Air (in 1992 and 2005) and both times, the pilots’ English skills were good.

But the pilot from the following clip definitely should take a refresher course in English speaking and listening comprehension before flying again. I am sure, he has after this verbal and potentially dangerous mishap, which took place in 2006.

I could hardly understand the pilot’s English and to my fairly untrained ears in regards to understanding English spoken with a Chinese accent, his English sounded Chinese at times.

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If you’d like to know the exact content of the dialogue, see this clip Air China “talks” to JFK Ground on You Tube.

Important Hessentag Information

The school has just forwarded this useful information regarding the Hessentag, the traffic and transportation situation in the town of Oberursel, and a few highlights of the event.
Even though the content is related in some parts only to FIS, this information might also benefit all other English speakers in our area.

1. Traffic closures
During Hessentag, areas of Oberursel have been broken down into zones. Depending on the zone, traffic is either fully or partially prohibited. The red zones will only be accessible by car between 8 – 20 June from 6:00 – 9:30 in the morning. Please note that the red zone is closed off three days longer than the duration of the event!

The other colored zones are accessible from 10-19 June only with a special permit, which is generally only available to residents of that area.  This means that parents from outside of Oberursel will not be able to drive through the center of Oberursel to get to school.  For a map of the various zones, click here.

2. Access to FIS

FIS will be accessible via the Hohemark Strasse between the Lahn Strasse and B455 exit Hohemark.
• Please be aware that there will be increased traffic, congestion and a longer driving time to get to school from 9-20 June.
• The school parking lots of the Primary School, including the one across the street, as well as on the Waldlust campus will be completely closed after school on Friday, 17 June until Monday morning, 20 June, for the Hessentag parade.
3. Public transportation
We encourage all visitors to the town center to use public transportation, which will take one to the edge of the Altstadt.  All other traffic within the Altstadt is restricted to pedestrians.

• The U-Bahn and S-Bahn will be running every 15 minutes for the duration of Hessentag. The best U-Bahn access to the center of town is the stop “Oberursel Altstadt”.
• The bus lines 41 and 42 will not be able to drive through town as usual and will thus be split into separate routes above and below the closed off areas. They will travel on a 30-minute schedule. Bus 42A also goes from FIS (departs 13 and 43 after the hour) to the Brüder Winter Strasse, but NOT on the day of the Hessentag parade, 19 June.

4. Parking at Hessentag
There are two huge parking lots available during the event. For a look at their location, see P1 and P2 on this map.
• P1, which is accessible only from the Frankfurter Landstrasse, is closer to the Altstadt, but is still a 20-minute walk away.
5. FIS participation at Hessentag
A number of FIS-related events will take place during Hessentag. Click here for a map.
• 10-18 June – 10:00-19:00; Activity tent on the Königsteiner Strasse/Corner Füller Strasse; Student, parents and teachers will offer various activities to the Hessentag guests. For a detailed look at the events, click here.
• 16 June – 17:00-19:20; FIS 50th Anniversary Performing Arts Showcase; ES and US students will demonstrate their creative talents on the Thomas Cook International Stage on the Bleiche. Parents can park at school and take public transport downtown, but  please note that the school closes at 22:00.

• 19 June: 13:00; Hessentag Parade through the Altstadt with a pedestrian group of FIS students and staff dressed in national costumes.

6. Hessentag Highlights
The full program is available in German here.
The school has also put a short list of some events together that do not require language skills. That information can be found here.

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