School Jokes

Little Tommy was doing very badly in math. His parents had tried everything; flash cards, special learning centers, in short, everything they could think of. Finally in a last dash effort, they took Tommy down and enrolled him in the local Catholic school. After the first day, little Tommy comes home with a very serious look on his face. He doesn’t kiss his mother hello. Instead, he goes straight to his room and start studying. Books and papers are spread out all over the room and little Tommy is hard at work. His mother is amazed. She calls him down to dinner and she was shocked, the minute he is done he marches back to his room without a word and in no time he is back hitting the books as hard as before. This goes on for sometime, day after day while the mother tries to understand what made all the difference. Finally, little Tommy brings home his report card. He quietly lays it on the table and goes up to his room and hits the books. With great trepidation, his mom looks at it and to her surprise, little Tommy got an A in math. She can no longer hold her curiosity. She goes to his room and says, Son, what was it? Was it the nuns?

Little Tommy looks at her and shakes his head.

Well, then, she replies, was it the books, the discipline, the structure, the uniforms? What was it?

Little Tommy looks at her and says,” Well, on the first day of school, when I saw that guy nailed to the plus sign, I knew they weren’t fooling around.”

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School Jokes

Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school. Her marks were good…mostly A’s and a couple of B’s. However, her teacher had written across the bottom:

“Sally is a smart little girl, but she has one fault. She talks too much in school. I have an idea I am going to try, which I think may break her of the habit.”

Sally’s dad signed her report card, putting a note on the back:

“Please let me know if your idea works on Sally because I would like to try it out on her mother.”

School Jokes

The board of education in a small town sold off a building that had once served as a one-room schoolhouse. The new owner converted it into a tavern.

One day an elderly man was passing the tavern with his grandson and pointed at the building. “That’s where I went to school l when I was your age.”

“Really,” said the boy. “Who was your bartender back then?”

School Jokes

A high school geometry teacher started his lesson on triangles by reading a theorem. “If an angle is an exterior angle of a triangle, then its measure is greater than the measure of either its corresponding remote interior angles.”

The teacher noticed one student not taking any notes and asked him why. “Well,” he replied sincerely, “I’m waiting until you start speaking English again.”

School Jokes

The professor of an economics class asked for an example of non-remunerated outlay of capital.

One student replied, “Taking one’s sister out to dinner and the movies.”