There were many times U.S. Americans asked me about my immigration experience to the U.S.A, which I had thought to be very strict. I had to pass an HIV test, get finger printed, produce my German police records, supply affidavits, show my bank account, dispute my sexual activities, etc. I remember thinking, instead of immigrating legally to the United States of America, it would have been easier to immigrate illegally to Russia at that time… but I have learned this now.

· If you cross the North Korean border illegally, you get 12 years hard labor.
· If you cross the Iranian border illegally, you are detained indefinitely.
· If you cross the Afghan border illegally, you get shot.
· If you cross the Saudi Arabian border illegally, you will be jailed.
· If you cross the Chinese border illegally, you may never be heard from again.
· If you cross the Venezuelan border illegally, you will be branded a spy and your fate will be sealed.
· If you cross the Cuban border illegally, you will be thrown into political prison to rot.

Having been raised in überbureaucratic Germany, I never would have even considered crossing any border illegally, whether into Holland, North Korea, or Tuvalu.

On the other hand, if you cross some European countries’ borders illegally, you might get:
* A job
* A drivers license
* A social security card
* Welfare
* Food stamps
* Credit cards
* Subsidized rent or a loan to buy a house
* Free education
* Free health care

Some illegal immigrants to Germany end up having to leave the country again, either by being deported or through the option of Freiwillige Ausreise (voluntary departure).

It is a crazy world out there.